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Quiverfull is a “belief,” not a lifestyle!

Posted by on November 15, 2009

When you read my revelatory book Birthing God’s Mighty Warriors which is about God’s first commandment in Genesis 1:28, “Be fruitful and Multiply,” you will not find references to home school, wearing little house on the prairie dresses, sewing, home birth, or submission teaching. Why? because allowing the Lord to plan your family involves NONE of these things! Unfortunately Kathryn Joyce, who wrote the book, Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement tried to create a broad stroked idea that couples who allow God to plan their families are all alike; living ultra conservative lifestyles that most normal Americans would be adverse too.

In my opinion this is a tainted look; it sells books, but is not the truth about what it means to follow God’s first command.

My family is the polar opposite of just about everything Kathryn Joyce wrote about and calls quivefull. The CBS documentary Born to Breed which is currently airing on Women’s Entertainment NETWORK taped us for two full days as they did the two other families. We play tennis, my girls dance, we water ski and I am a former waterski champion, we work out at the YMCA, our children are in public school. Our children take gymnastics and play sports and we live in an exclusive lake community outside a major city. I’ve taught my girls to sew but not as a lifestyle, they want to sew because we love to watch Project Runway! I visited MOOD fabrics on my recent trip to NYC!

Our family is more like the Steve Martin 2003 movie, “Cheaper by the Dozen.” We have a lot of fun as a family and we are very modern and relatable. I do believe America would fall in love with our family! We felt blessed to have been chosen to be in the WE documentary. Our production team was amazing and a joy to work with. But people who know us and who have watched the documentary are saying they’re not sure whether people could see how diverse our family is or how diverse this Quiverfull movement really is based on how we were presented.

This quiver full movement is only about one thing: allowing God to plan your family, everything else is a personal lifestyle choice and one size does not fit all families because no two families are alike.

Kathryn Joyce termed her book as an inside look into Christian Patriarchy. My husband and I have been churchgoers since birth (a total of 90 years between us) and we’ve never even heard of “patriarchy” nor heard other modern Christians refer to being patriarchs. We know it is in the Bible as the Old Testament characters are referred to as being patriarchs but in modern times it is not an ever day term. From our investigation we believe Kathryn was using it when referring to female submission. Neither of us feel we have any problems in that area! My husband knew when he married me that he was getting a strong, secure woman. Our thirty year marriage is a team building marriage much like any other modern marriage and certainly not a submissive dictatorship. Everyone who knows us knows that I tell my husband what we need to do as much as he tells me. It goes back and forth and works as a very balanced mutually exclusively submission and one that we feel is quite a healthy idea of what biblical submission truly is.

I do believe in women’s rights and part of those rights is for women to have the right to have the children that they want for their lives. We act like birth control gave us the right to control things but in reality it stole our right from us! There are so many women out there, religious and non religious who are longing for the children they did not get to have because their spouse says, “no!” This is a crime against women that must stop! We are the nurturers in society and we  must be allowed to birth the children that fit our lives.  I am deeply committed to getting a message out to all women about why they need to consider birthing more children. Why should a woman’s heart have to ache when she has more love to give! Our children instead of our things is what will make us truly happy and I want women to think long and hard before they turn that right over to a pill or a man to control. We only get one season in life to birth our children and if we allow society or our spouse or our parents or our girlfriends to talk us out of the child that our heart longs for, we will miss one of the greatest blessings God intended for us.

My goal with my first book “Birthing God’s Mighty Warriors” is to get the word out that we’ve been lied to and that God’s word really expresses that true joy comes from family!..”the greatest things I’ve accomplished in life I owe to my mother”…”the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world”…:when life is over it is the people we loved and the love we’ve given that will truly live on past us”..R

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